There’s a good amount of people in the world who have taken the safe route in life and have never moved out of the city they grew up in. I commend those people. Hey, sometimes getting out of your comfort zone is over rated. I’m happy for you. You do you.  After all, who wants to move to a new place if there’s no reason to?

Then there’s me. I’ve actually moved to a different country just to avoid growing up and getting a job after college. That was over a decade ago so I’ll tell you about that another time. For now let’s focus on the “normal” reasons people move to different cities/countries. Most will move for work, a significant other or even retirement. Whatever your reason might be, once you’ve moved to that new city you will experience a few typical emotions. First there’s excitement. If you’re there with your significant other you’re busy settling in to your new place, trying new restaurants and exploring your new surroundings. You have an energy about you that attracts people to you because everything is new and stimulating. You think to yourself, this move is going to be so easy. It’s fun, right? Yeah, for a little while, then reality hits and you start missing your friends, family and everything about being, “home”.  That fun energy that you had when you first got to your new city fades off and you’re left feeling alone and homesick. These emotions typically recycle themselves a few times until you finally realize you are home, wherever that may be.

This post is to make that transition a little easier for you. SO here you go, here are my tips:

Use Social Media:

Before your big move, post on facebook (or whatever your beloved network might be) what city you’re moving to. Ask if anyone knows someone in that city. There’s a good chance someone on your friends list knows someone and maybe, just maybe they’d like to show you around. After all, you have a mutual friend so you must have something in common, right? You may also have a friend in that town that you didn’t know lived there. If they see your post they might reach out! Also, if you don’t have social media you’re just isolating yourself. I know social media can have a bad reputation at times but it also brings people together. Just be smart and safe about it.

Move to a Major City:

I know this one is far fetched, but I wanted to put it on the list regardless. A lot of people won’t be able to choose where they move when it comes to work, but some do. If you can move to a major city, there’s a good chance that someone you know lives in New York, LA, Chicago or even London. These are major cities for a reason, ya know?

Swipe Right on Friendship Apps:

This might seem weird to some people and TBH I was actually a little embarrassed when I started using a friendship app… but then I got over it and signed up for Bumble BFF. Thank god I did! I’ve met some awesome girls. Thanks Bumble BFF! It’s basically swiping right on girls or (if you’re a guy) guys you’d want to hang with. Just like a dating app, but not. The sexes are separated so you only make friends with the same sex. Otherwise it would be a dating app.

Don’t take people for granted:

If someone is nice enough to show you around or take you to lunch be grateful to that person. Don’t ignore their texts later on down the road when you’ve met people you click with better. These are good people and it’s smart to keep them close, trust me.  They are likely the ones that will be there for you when you really need someone in your new city.

Join A club:

Join a club or get on meetup.com and join a group that shares a similar interest. I’ve used meetup.com to join a small dog puppy playgroup before. It was a great experience and I met a lot of nice fur parents that I still keep in touch with today.

Use your faith:

If you practice a certain faith or religion, you can use that to expand your community. Whatever your faith may be there is likely a place for you to connect with likeminded individuals nearby. Just do a quick Google search and see what comes up near you. IE: Buddhist temples near me.

Work it out:

Joining a gym is great. You can work up a sweat, feel your best and if you’re lucky make a friend or two while you’re at it. I find joining a specific type of training facility is better though. By that I mean joining crossfit, a barre studio or Orange theory versus an LA fitness or Equinox. A class that specializes in specific training will typically bring people closer together and make it easier to get to know one another. Either one is good, I just like the latter better.

So those are my tips! These are the things I did to make new friends and beat the blues in California these past six months. It’s funny because to be completely honest I’m more social now than I was in my previous city.

One last thing before I end this post.. Please be picky with your friendships. Choose to be around people that make you feel good and that you can be yourself around. Choose friends that respect and appreciate you. Take a moment to reevaluate your wants and needs for your future friendships before putting yourself out there.  Be yourself but always be a good listener. No one wants to be around someone who likes to hear themselves talk. So here’s your chance to reinvent your world and find your new squad! Good luck!